Thursday, May 18, 2006
I am depressed.
I have so many thoughts; I don't know where to start.
I feel like crying. Have you ever had that feeling? The need to cry? I have been holding my tears back since Tuesday noon, trying to look strong. Well, I am surprised from myself, I never had that ability to hold back my tears, I used to be very sensitive and it was the easiest thing on earth to cry. Maybe I should be happy that I learnt to control my self. Or isn’t it sad to loose the only sensitive part you had?
I didn't cry, Yet!! But I do feel the urge need, I feel I would collapse at the first click.
I just have a question. Say you are in a middle of a discussion with someone, who thinks that you have done a big mistake (Maybe you actually did, but this is not my question), and it holds much more than it shows; that it ruined the trust, and you are irresponsible.... Then suddenly, the other person asks you: "am I exaggerating about it?" and then answers himself "I don’t think so". What is this supposed to mean? Wouldn’t it mean that somewhere deep down he feels he is actually exaggerating? I mean if that person did not feel he's gone too far, would that thought of being "Exaggerative " cross his mind? It wouldn’t cross my mind unless I really feel I am exaggerating, BIG TIME!
More problems are coming in the way. I really feel down! I know I seem to be a very bad-mooded person, and I know it's not fun at all reading such posts…
I don't even have a weekend to look forward to!
Anyway, life seems better after eating!
I hope no other problems are waiting for me behind the door!
I feel a bit better!